In some sense, I
must have been
born of the sky.
I have never hated
a star, no matter
how dim its light.
I think, sometimes,
I forget that I, too,
am a miraculous
body of matter
caught in space.
I am a smaller
kind of dying
On how expensive it is to love things:
- Bazooka Rocks III is already next weekend and I have neither the ticket nor the money to buy the ticket and it’s depressing me. If I miss this show - and it seems that I will - this will be the third Bazooka fest in a row that I will be missing. This yearly festival brings my favorite bands to town and I always miss the opportunity to watch them live. I really want to hear The Summer Set’s Legendary and You Me At Six’s Crash live, and the mere thought that I won’t be able to attend the festival kills me.
- Tickets to the Multiply tour will be in September, which is next month. Since it’s Ed Sheeran, I am assuming it will be expensive, though I am hoping that it’s not as expensive as Taylor Swift’s. I don’t want to miss his concert like I missed Taylor’s. I swear that will be heartbreaking.
- MIBF is next month and money is still non-existent.
- I’m currently updating my iBooks library and as happy as I am that these books are accessible, it makes me sad that I’m not doing this book ‘shopping’ in book stores. I still have a lot of to-be-read books - actual copies - but you know, one can never really get enough.
- Life has been really hard lately and as much as I want all these things that I love, I really can’t make more of a burden of myself than I already am. It’s hard enough as it is and I really don’t want to trouble my parents any further.
- I really can’t wait to earn my own money so I could spend on these things that I love without feeling guilty.
Everyone wants to be the sun to lighten up everyone’s life, but why not be the moon, to brighten in the darkest hour.
How strange it is. We have these deep terrible lingering fears about ourselves and the people we love. Yet we walk around, talk to people, eat and drink. We manage to function. The feelings are deep and real. Shouldn’t they paralyze us? How is it we can survive them, at least for a little while? We drive a car, we teach a class. How is it no one sees how deeply afraid we were, last night, this morning? Is it something we all hide from each other, by mutual consent? Or do we share the same secret without knowing it? Wear the same disguise?
Mark Strand, opening strophe to “The Guardian,” from Darker: Poems (Atheneum, 1971)
The sun setting. The lawns on fire.
The lost day, the lost light.
Why do I love what fades?
Jonathan Safran Foer,
from Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
I wish I were a poet. I’ve never confessed that to anyone, and I’m confessing it to you, because you’ve given me reason to feel that I can trust you. I’ve spent my life observing the universe, mostly in my mind’s eye. It’s been a tremendously rewarding life, a wonderful life. I’ve been able to explore the origins of time and space with some of the great living thinkers. But I wish I were a poet.
Albert Einstein, a hero of mine, once wrote, ‘Our situation is the following. We are standing in front of a closed box which we cannot open.’
I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that the vast majority of the universe is composed of dark matter. The fragile balance depends on things we’ll never be able to see, hear, smell, taste, or touch. Life itself depends on them. What’s real? What isn’t real? Maybe those aren’t the right questions to be asking. What does life depend on?
I wish I had made things for life to depend on.
When you’re writing, the best thing you can say to yourself is:
'I can only get better from here.'
The point of the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge
the point of pouring a shit ton of ice water over yourself is because when one suffers from amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) one of the affects the disease has is a numbness throughout the body, as well as struggling to breathe, and both these are meant to temporarily happen when doused in freezing water. It’s to raise awareness of what ALS feels like and encourage donations towards research and cures.